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Troisnyx

398 Audio Reviews

263 w/ Responses

0:00-0:16: The intro sounds rather MIDI-ish, has too much reverb and sounds too wet, and doesn't give the sense of urgency that you had when you listened to the original battle. This is a *battle theme* for crying out loud! Give it justice by starting it with a sense of urgency!

0:17-0:23: Those synths sound nice, but the melody which is meant to play in this section is blending too much in the background. Again, too much reverberation from that melody line.

0:24-0:44: The bass and kick drums sound rather too soft; the snare drum is audible over those two, so it really doesn't give that much punch. Without the headset it is audible, but you might want to try turning those up. The plus side here is that the melody is audible, which is great.

0:44-1:04: Another melodic synth comes in, which is a nice change in instrumentation, but you may want to consider *layering* two melodic synths instead. Have one play the main melody just like the previous one, and then have one play the broken chords in the background, so you can hear some sustain. That'd be a nice effect, if you can pull it off. Treat the broken chords like a counter-melody, one that will bring the piece out.

1:04-1:24: There's only the melody and the bass and the drums? This makes the piece anticlimactic, if anything else. A battle theme is supposed to have rising tension, and then when the loop ends, falling tension. Instrument layering and dynamics would've been very much welcome here. There's the occasional synth, but.... it doesn't do much to build up to the climax.

1:25-1:34: HEAVENS NO. The melody is not even audible here! The strings are too blended with the background! The synth is beautiful, with all its echoes, but note: THIS IS THE CLIMAX OF THE PIECE!! Why, why, WHYYYYY is the melody almost inaudible? Why is there not an increase in layering?

1:35: Standard falling tension, which would've worked effectively had you actually taken care to build up the tension throughout the piece.

3:19: Why did the drums not fade? O_O

Some rules of thumb:
1) MELODIES STAND OUT. Countermelodies, while they are slightly in the background, can help flesh your piece out a whole lot more. That's why THEY'RE LOUDER than everything else!

2) Dynamics and instrument layering. Essentially your loud and soft, and also how many instruments play in a piece at once. This can help with rising and falling tension. Without these, the piece would (and does) soudn bland and tasteless.

3) As I mentioned in a previous review of one of your pieces: with video game music, the pieces that stand out have originality to them to varying degrees. A lot of them have the composer's personal touch, and wouldn't be note-for-note replicas of the video game themes. This one, however, is a note-for-note replica, I can pick out every note as the exact same as the original. With these video game themes we want to hear *you* -- we want to hear how you can TRANSFORM this theme into something that only you can create. Think about the good video game remixes on the interwebs: they go by that same principle.

2/5.

The mix throughout almost entirely borrows sounds/note patterns from the original, which doesn't sit too well with most of us. While it is a faithful recreation of Butter Building, we want to hear *you*, what makes this remix or cover *yours*.

The first half of the remix has those fast drums (quickstep), and honestly..... quickstep with an already busy-ish melody doesn't sit right... Perhaps it does make Kirby look like he's walking like a tubby ol' bear across the level, which is great, until you realise that there's a lot going on that you don't want to stifle the melody or the synths at the back.

The second half of the remix, the part that begins with the A chord, sounds simply beautiful, but again, as I said, it's a faithful recreation of the remix -- and I insist upon hearing a personal touch to video game remixes, simply because there are a lot of them out there and some must stand out above others.

No complaints about mixing, as I heard all the instruments in their proper place.

3.5/5.

cmperry1984 responds:

wll you know what, i could care less what you insist on because, in my own opinion if you are going to make a remix you should be faithful to the source material.

Nice piano intro, and I like the buildup after at, especially when the kick drum comes in. I love the sound of that kick drum <3 And here, I notice you've gone into a new melody after the first one. It transitions back to the main melody very well, and there's also a bit of instrument layering when that happens.

One thing I notice right off the bat is that there's no volume variation between the notes. Now, I've made this mistake too, with my older submissions. Whatever software you use, there should be some volume control thing (lines below the piano roll) which you can left-click manually or hold the left-click button and pass your mouse through.

The main melody repeats itself quite a lot, so why not add a bit of variation to the main melody? Keeping the chords as they are, but variation makes a change in how much a piece hooks a listener.

Also, I notice that the separate parts (basses, drums etc.) come in without any sort of buildup: they come in abruptly, but really, that's due to volume control. Learning to make a volume envelope for when they come in and when they go out (so that they may fade in / fade out) will be very, very useful here.

Solid effort; build up where the piece is found wanting and you'll have yourself a good piece in no time.

3.5/5.

Right off the bat, I notice an improvement from the last section, with more varied chords (and inversions), with STILL a more memorable melody...

Again, however, I notice that this is a few-second loop which could've been wrapped around itself during exporting: to have it as long as 4mn 16s would mean, we listeners expect buildup, instrument layering, dynamics changes, a bridge... before going back to the main theme.

3.5/5.

Props for getting the chords, metrics etc. musically correct.

Granted, I'm aware this is a chiptune, but... here we find a few composition no-nos:

1) A loop that lasts for a few seconds, which DOES NOT BUILD UP with any layers of instrumentation, differing chords or sections, or even differing melody lines or dynamics,
2) And all that, coupled with a I - V - vi - IV chord sequence, which a lot of mainstream pieces are guilty of.

Even if this were an end theme with cutscenes or credits, part of what makes the piece memorable is not only the melody, it's the buildup: what goes into the substance of the piece. Let me give you a good example: Ashes of Dreams from Nier. Or even, the credits theme for Kingdom Hearts 1 (Capriccio I forget what the rest of the title is). Both of them have a recognisable melody, like yours. But what makes them stand out is that they tell a story. Every piece that tells a story must ACT like a story: it must build up, have a climax and a resolution -- and this piece has neither.

2/5.

The speed, the trance feel of this piece, and just the fast counter-melodies of this piece -- it all reminds me of something out of Touhou. Beautiful.

This is the first of the submissions that stood out to me for this contest. <3 All the best.
And yes, it is disturbing... but I guess that's what the song is trying to convey? I get the image of a circus with all those flashy lights going on and there's this atmosphere of people crowding round wanting to see what's going on, and in the background, somewhere in a hidden corner outside the venue, is this creepy clown who wasn't invited to the proverbial party, rubbing his hands together as he conspires to ruin the night for everyone.

Beautiful rendition of a beautiful song. ^_^

ZipZipper responds:

Aahhh yay thank you! <3 All the best to you too.

Someone needed to remake Dark Castle with much better music than that Mega Drive version of Toccata and Fugue in D minor...

But that having been said: beautiful instrumentation, beautifully frightening. Turning this into a loop would be great, but I would also recommend throwing in a counter-melody or two so as to build up on the tension. Not to say that there isn't buildup already -- but we can only do so much with short pieces.

4.5/5.

ChineseBoar1995 responds:

Thanks for the review! And also thanks for the nice recommendation, too! I'll consider on that whenever I make the loop. :D

Last I remembered, Yuna's Theme was a tad slower than this... but the airy feel of the higher notes makes up for it. I can sense expression in the playing, but this one seemed as if it was rushed through, rather than savoured.

I did notice a few parts where you made an attempt to make the piece your own. That's great; remember however that Yuna in Final Fantasy X is more subdued and fragile -- don't rush that theme when it's trying to convey these emotions.

3.5/5.

Aikata responds:

I really appreciate your critique. I tend to get a bit enthusiastic and rush through this piece a bit. Maybe I'll give it another shot with a bit softer tone?

Thanks again for the review!

It's a short track, but I enjoyed it. As a bodhran player and Celtic music afficionado, I heartily approve of this. <3

SilverPoyozo responds:

I love Celtic music as well, but only recently I've got the VSTs to actually pull it off.

Well, I'm glad you liked it!

Soundsmith, artist, and writer. Known for self-backing choir. Especially love drumming.
If you'd like to work with me, send enquiries via DM or my email at mail@troisnyx.co.uk
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Annette Walker @Troisnyx

Age 32, she/they

Music Director

Lancashire, UK

Joined on 6/26/11

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