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Alright, let's break it down section by section.

The animation was pretty well done, pretty fluid. You stuck to the simplicity of the original Scribblenauts graphics, and that's a plus.

The voice acting was highly believable, and blended well with the scenes. I had very much pity for the townsman and his wife, and regarded Maxwell as the devil's ilk after watching this. Plus the choice of music! The Kill Bill whistle at the end was rather ominous, but rather fitting: I felt like killing Maxwell. If they say someone dies after that whistle, I think a lot of people watching this can say that Maxwell should be next.

The plot is a case of "that escalated quickly," in that Maxwell's misdeeds were piling one on top of the other, but *even the ending escalated quickly*. In fact, I'd say, rather abruptly. When watching things like these, the viewer WANTS to have the satisfaction of having Maxwell's misdeeds backfire at him somehow. What we were left with was a rather terrible cliffhanger which left a lot of unease inside.

In fact, might I add, the plot has come close to the *true* definition of "yaoi" -- "yama nashi, ochi nashi, imi nashi" (no peak, no denouement, no meaning). What we have is a shallow instance of "oh hey, I'm going to stroll down the town one day and cause mischief to one of my townspeople, and that's the end". Granted, everyone can imagine the kind of trouble one can wreak with that notebook, but surely some development could be added? Like, something beyond Maxwell's mischief making?

tl;dr: Fluid animation, excellent music choice and excellent voice acting. Plot, however, is seriously left wanting.


Having been raised in MY, I appreciate the humour. Good work! I don't know what to say about what the 'lions' look like, but "PSY" and Cai Shen look quite convincing.

Oh, and ATM rosak problems even happen on this end. :P

Isn't that the animation that Chuggaa liked? I kinda liked it, though I thought the ending was..... sad...

Horsenwelles responds:

yep, he liked it and he flooded the video with hundreds of people through influence. my god what a fun way to start the day.

anyway, the ending is a humor deflection. an anti-joke in essence. its all about what just witnessed and how you are handling what events occurred on screen. its not as sad as it is emotionally conflicting, and thats why i chose it. eh, thats all fancy shmansey biz

For a first movie, the artwork is impeccable.

Some parts of the animation need a few more frames to make them look natural, i.e. breath movements, moving hair... It looks unnatural if they just stayed put like that.

Also, try doing the same for those scenes of Cloud, Sephiroth, Terra, Ventus, Aqua etc... when they are shown on screen for like one second or two. Because those parts look like still images, and that makes the production a little sloppy.

Still, great job!

cateusart responds:

Glad you liked it.

Um..... Badly-spelt subs, short movie.... Mmmmmh...... I didn't get to listen to the audio but those visual flaws are already gashing the experience for me.

adriangoadrian responds:

be nice!

I don't mind your art direction, and I really love the starry sky in the background. But apart from the intro, everything's pretty motionless... the girl especially. The best thing would be for a trance-like track to play, and she dances and sings. There are comets and night lights flickering and appearing every now and then, and it's an exhilarating space trip.

Now, I know animating this will be a chalenge, considering how you animated the girl in the intro. Even that animation wasn't completely seamless. The concept is alright, but a lot of work -- and I mean A LOT -- needs to be done.

cuddlesthemighty responds:

great idea's thanks.

Really good work!

I discovered this work after seeing that my track, Arise Once More, was featured in this, so I thought I'd take a look. I watched from Scene 1, and it's quite entertaining. ^_^ My only complaint would be that the subs are a bit unclear for all those colours on the screen...

Congratulations on your Daily Fifth Place, and keep it up!

DingoWalleyStudio responds:

I hope you don't mind I used the song without asking XD Thanks for liking the Cartoon though :D

Short but beautiful.

Such a short video has spoken volumes. Congrats to you guys for your efforts.

jackbliss responds:

Thank you so much! Jai Hind my brother :)

Lovely Flash... really lovely Flash.

The story is heartwarming at the beginning and sad at the end. The turn at the end was somewhat well executed, and this is easily one of the best there is out there on NG. Simply beautiful.

And seriously, I don't care about what the rest say, but I'll have to agree with APXypher on the moral tale.


Good submission (I suppose the fight between man and robot still isn't settled), but shouldn't you be putting this under PG13 for language? I found this under "All Audiences" and.... this is not something really fit for the young 'uns, at the very least.

Pronounced "trwa-nix." I dream up meepy dreams full of meep.
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Annette Singh @Troisnyx

29, Female


Lancashire, UK

Joined on 6/26/11

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