I've gained a little confidence to play the harp publicly, although I probably will need more practice with it if my repertoire is to be as varied as I'd like it to be. But I've become comfortable with Síle, as I like to call my harp. Confidence has not been an easy thing to build for me altogether... as evidenced by my reactions to various things on Newgrounds and elsewhere.

Just thought I'd share this quick picture that Seán took of me when I was playing the harp in his room -- I was playing as a form of prayer, playing hymns that I knew how to sing. Incidentally, at the time he took this picture, the sun was setting.

I hope the time will come when I may be able to bring Síle to live performances, open mics and whatever, and share some improvs with you all.

In other news.... I've received dates for my asylum appeal quite a while back; I just didn't find any reason to write about them till now. Case management is set for 17 June, and the full hearing is set for 1 July. I am scared for my life (to be fair, I always have been scared for my life, but I have even more reason to be, at this point in my life).

I pray not only for success in this hearing, but also that I may heal from everything I've been put through, and that this period in my life (as well as much of my past) may one day be nothing more than a distant memory, a demon successfully exorcised.

My mind is in absolute turmoil, and those closest to me have had to deal with my many panic attacks and all sorts of trouble coming from me. Please pray for me, and/or send me some good thoughts. They'll be much appreciated.

First of all, I want to thank you lot for your support with the last post I wrote on here. It's been a bit of a roller-coaster ride. My friends have been coming forward with witness statements about this, that and the other that the Home Office neglected to put into their detailed reasons of refusal. That, and I'm seeking legal representation for this appeal. Beyond that, I will do my absolute best to fight this cause.

Many people have said that I have a strong case, and that the Home Office was sloppy in disregarding chunks of evidence.

Let me say also for the record that in the detailed reasons of refusal of my asylum, the Home Office does not believe that Troisnyx (or TroisNyxEtienne) and Annette Singh are one and the same person. So, for the record, let me clear it up for those folks here on this very page: TROISNYX, TROISNYXETIENNE AND ANNETTE SINGH ARE THE SAME PERSON. FULL STOP. There. I already made my name public through the Art section of my page, but some people just aren't willing to do basic research to prove my identity. Sigh.

It is a trying time for me and Seán and all those around me. Please pray for us, or send us good thoughts. They will all be appreciated.

In other news, I did mention in Asandir's interview of me last year about the Easter Triduum. Just as I did last year, I'm practising with the choir at St Wilfrid's in Preston -- I am assuming the role of timpanist once again, among other roles (harp, soprano and descant vocals, general nuisance, chief tripper-upper, provider of chocolates...). These videos from today's practice are the first to go on my YouTube channel since.... New Year's Day 2014, it has seriously been that long. I am embedding this playlist for your general enjoyment. Hope you folks like it!

P.S.: To all the timpanists out there on NG, if anyone of you should make comments about my general demeanour while playing.... I only have this to say. Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa.

In September 2013, I mentioned that I have been fighting an intense battle for my future, my dreams, my life and my liberty, and that who I am as a person is at stake, and my freedoms are at stake. This battle is far from over.

I think it's about time I made the details of this battle public.

I am an asylum seeker.

And I know first-hand what it's like to be tarred with the same brush as many other people seeking asylum, to be called a benefit scrounger, although I have never claimed any finances from the state. That is only the stigma, and only part of the problem...

I am originally from Malaysia. For a long time there, I had been abused for my race in various situations in which the authorities could have intervened -- in school, as a conscript for a three-month National Service stint, and elsewhere. The abuse is physical, verbal, mental and emotional. I have also written articles and human rights dossiers detailing the extent of human rights abuses in Malaysia, both during my time in Malaysia and during my time in Britain.

Malaysia has draconian security laws, and every human rights organisation I have searched on the internet testifies to this. The most notorious of these laws, which is used to prosecute people who don't remotely have a case, is the Sedition Act 1948. In an era of the internet, globalisation, and increased awareness of human rights, it's hard to believe that sedition is really a thing. But it is... and it's scary. Say the wrong thing, and you could be tried -- and if you're let off, you'd perhaps be imprisoned without trial. This is what I face, and it scares me to death.

So anyone who is even slightly critical of the government could be done in under Malaysian law.

I am currently fighting an appeal against a decision from the Home Office, which I read and found severely lacking in research, and also failed to mention all the sources that I presented during the process so far.

Up till now, I had been so afraid of even mentioning it... because of the stigma, and because of the notion that if I ever said anything which was critical of the Malaysian government, I would be a traitor and a coward. I am tossing all that aside now, while writing this post.

In addition, the only immediate family I have left is my dad... who is still in Malaysia and heavens know where he is. Honestly, I don't know where he lives. The only communication I have with him is via e-mail, and that in itself is sporadic. Go to Human Rights Watch and you'll find a report or two of people of Indian descent being shot sporadically in the streets in Malaysia by the police, who subsequently make allegations that these people approached the police with machetes. There is a long-running stereotype that any leader of a gang is of Indian descent, and because they target the Malay majority and make it unsafe for them, there is now a "shoot first, talk later" policy. I am of Indian descent, and so is my dad..... he could be shot for going out one evening just for being at the wrong place at the wrong time. And, if I ever go back there, the same could happen to me. I am terrified.

I ask for your prayers and good thoughts, and anything you can muster. Thanks.

I will admit I am writing this while tired and weary, but it's about time all this was made known.

My first lyrics video and video game song cover in nearly two years. With the recent file loss I had, I am starting on a blank slate. I'm excited to share this with you all once it is done.

...but can't write code or use it to save my life. But: I can write music, and I have just installed Stencyl for myself, so that I can learn as well. If anyone would like to join me in making a project (ideally, someone who knows how to use the software and help me learn past the tutorials, and someone who has a good sense of rhythm somehow because I kinda feel that might be important), I will be grateful.

In other news, the worst has happened AGAIN. I have lost all my files again as a result of OS problems I had on this computer. Thanks, Windows.

And I hope you all love it.

This is only the teaser to it, and it's quite short -- but I did the music AND recorded the vocals for this teaser, all during the course of yesterday -- and I thoroughly enjoyed it. ^_^

In other news, editing this post because the NG Audio Portal Podcast episode 6 has just been released, and my Zelda cover, Chant de l'Éveil, is the last song on it! Ooooooo~ happy times.

My piece aside, I liked listening to the podcast -- nice interview with @deadlyfishes in it, and one thing that I especially took to heart was the fact that we ought to broaden our musical horizons, and not stay enclosed in one genre all the time.

As a continuation to my previous news post: The sketches that I have completed in 712 More Things to Draw have been uploaded to my art thread. Feel absolutely free to take a look!

I intend to continue finishing and scanning more. At any rate, hope you enjoy them!

Those of you who know of the book titled 712 More Things to Draw and similar books like it, I got that book, and I've decided to work on whatever little drawing ability I have. It's especially hard for me to think of picking up a pencil to sketch at a time like this, but I'm trying to pierce the wall.

But enough about me being sick, tired and lacking in inspiration.

Would any of you perhaps like to see the artwork that I have done so far? If yes, I will gladly post it in my art thread. It'd likely be a series of photos rather than scans, but we'll see.

In other news... Seán has put forward the idea of me giving out a free-of-charge demo CD to friends and whoever else out there. It'd involve a few samples of works I've done, to say nothing about everything else that I've recorded. Some are covers, some aren't. Anyway, here are some photos:

Front. Many of you will recognise the artwork (it's this one). Also, the triquetra symbol was edited from something I already drew on my bodhrán skin, so it may probably look familiar to you lot too.

Sidebar.

Tracklist at the back (attention @Phyrnna).

The whole cover design was a simple-ish job, but cutting everything out without a paper guillotine is hellish to say the least. And a few of our jewel cases broke. To top it all off, it'd especially give people a "demo CD" vibe when there's no sticky label on the CD proper. Quite literally, it's what came out of the box of CDs. All I did was scrawl on the CDs with a marker, that was it. Oh well. The most hellish bit was that Seán and I started this at about 2-something in the afternoon, and we had to get done for 6-something, because I had choir practice last night at church and we were hoping to give out some copies to my friends in the choir then. We weren't even sure if we were going to finish the first batch!

Well, the first batch is done. More batches may come soon.

All songs can be found on Newgrounds, with just about the same titles.

That's about it for now, I guess. Slow activity, progress, healing, etc. otherwise. I thank you for your continued thoughts, prayers and support, and I ask that it may keep coming.

Ta for now,

T.

Sorry to you folks who have not heard from me in a while; I have been sick. And travelling down south. And being sick while travelling is not fun. >_<

So quick updates:

1. I'd spent the last two days down in London and in my old home of Hatfield, Hertfordshire, because Seán and I had planned this trip well in advance and we'd already booked the tickets. And we both weren't well. Oh well, we did enjoy those two days, and it was good to see old friends again, but I need my rest. My body feels rather battered.
2. On the subject of old friends, one of my friends from Hatfield has passed away. Just writing my thoughts here, but in addition to praying for the repose of her soul, I would really like to pen a piece of music in her honour. I hope I do get to it...
3. I am considering remaking one of my previous tracks. Specifically, it is a cover, or a slew of covers all mixed into one. I am talking about Capriccio Bullet Heaven, a series of covers of @Phyrnna's works from Bullet Heaven.
4. I commentated on two Let's Play videos on behalf of the Kingdom Hearts Wiki, as a user on there. You can view said videos here and here. And..... yeah, I was certainly not at my best there, and still am not, to a great extent.
5. Otherwise, I've had a very slow artistic/musical period. I'm going through a phase where I feel the hope within me is fast getting extinguished. It's just... you know, the usual signs of a depressed artist: feeling useless, unable to touch hearts, feeling inadequate, facing a series of traumatic recalls of memories from my youth that have led me to the state that I'm in now, etc., etc., etc. I would very much appreciate your prayers and good thoughts.
6. The NG 20th Anniversary Collab should be beginning soonish, I think. The way I see it, audio should begin by mid-February, or early March. Get us about a month, or a month and a half (or two months tops) to do our bit. Then, we give what we have to our artist and animator friends, and they'll do their bit. For my part, I'll be glad to contribute actively to this thing, and perhaps be on a panel of organisers....... but I cannot do this thing alone. With sickness etc. getting in the way, I don't think it wise to do this alone.

So that's it from me for now. In case you're wondering why I'm relatively silent, this is what's been going on. It's a lot to take in, maybe, but I trust I'm not alone going through this stuff. My thoughts and prayers go out to those of you who are going through similar circumstances, and anyone else besides who asks for them.

Thing is, I recently was gifted a drawing tablet -- it's a Trust Flex -- and I'd like to make livestreams of my drawings in progress, whenever possible. And ideally, I'd like to keep it open source. Trouble is, the last time I installed screen capture software, I installed CamStudio several months ago.... that went to pot, because it just wouldn't run.

So. What do you lot recommend? I'd like to hear your thoughts. In the meantime, here's a picture from my art thread, just because:

In the meantime, some more music is coming. Just a month ago I mentioned that @frootza and I are engaging in a virtual bodhrán duel. I hope to be recording my part either today or within the next few days. Advent, Christmas and New Year just caught up with me, and I couldn't record my part sooner. So.... prepare yourselves for a primal drumming feast!