This is a NGADM Round 2 review.
All scores are out of 10, for a total of 50.
The piece feels quite short, and restrained. The melodies played by the strings and other lead instruments are singable and memorable. The chords do feel like they repeat a fair bit. There's some slight deviation in the middle when the glock appears -- a welcome change, for were it not there, I daresay the piece might have sounded a tad samey to me.
Nice rallentando to bring in the main melody again.
Your soft-loud and structure are on point. I do wish that the piece were a little longer, as the melodies you introduced here, as well as the theme of grief and clutching at memories in dreams, are things worth expanding upon.
Wide, atmospheric, and bringing out the physicality of the instrument -- I have no complaints as far as this piece is concerned.
EMOTIONAL IMPACT: 10
The composition and the production here both give me a feeling of sorrow, the weight of mourning and loss on my chest, and the squeezing feeling that comes with it. The flute that comes in feels suitably mournful, reminiscent of someone singing a plaintive final chant to ease the loved one's soul.
1:31 brings to mind slightly happier moments, with that more playful glockenspiel -- they are fleeting away, like the physical proximity we had to a person we lost. The flute reappears again, losing some of its air -- almost as if the flautist playing is choking up, trying to muster breath to play in between the tears and the weight of sorrow on their chest.
It's back to the weight in my chest at about 2:31. I do feel my tear ducts filling, and the more I type about this, the more they fill.
Props to you for bringing about this visceral reaction of sorrow in such a noticeably short piece.
Sad mournful pieces like this are ubiquitous in VGM and films, and elegies with slightly scherzo elements are uncommon, but not unheard of. Shorter pieces with restrained melodies are also quite common.
That said: you owned this well, injecting a lot of visceral emotion into this mix, something which most pieces of this kind do not do. In my last review of a piece of yours I spoke of the physicality of an instrument; I sense it again here.
MEMORABILITY / REPLAYABILITY: 9.5
I remember every melody. I remember every articulation of each instrument, and the feeling it gave me. I remember the feeling of being squeezed with pain. I also remember how short it is.
Will I play this again? On its own, yes, but I would argue for a longer version in future. Will I recommend this to others? Yes, for the subtle emotional detail, and the feelings it gives.
EDIT: Following up on your response, I would vary. Vary, vary, vary. Give me the squirming of tremolo strings, give me the full vulnerability of a soul singing with their beloved before they part ways forever, into different planes. Go down musical paths less trodden. Write this with a LOT less restraint than you are doing, if possible. Grief is not a solemn, stately emotion a lot of the time. It is loud, it is uncomfortable, it rouses others to grief and compassion. It is also often unseen, and can ring like screams into the night. Imagine what it'd be like if you managed, through some emotional feat of strength, to pull this off — to go into the dream and to spare no emotional or environmental detail!
I'm saying this to you as a guideline. Don't just give me any song of grief. Give me *yours,* with every inch of tears and hard feelings and bitterness that stays for years to come. If the dream is pleasant, capture the gleam of the sunlight, the rippling of the water, every little detail, in as cohesive a form as possible, and taking us on a journey (which is what I'm expecting you want to do). Because right now, this is not something that many do, if this is done at all.
Uniqueness, to a great extent, is not just about blending influences. It's about defining what your own musical voice is, and letting that be drawn out. I know you will probably be searching in your soul for this; it can take a short time, it can take a long time.